a little bit of everything

I’m going to preface this by first apologizing for not being intentional in updating this blog. I’ll then say that although it is all real and near to my heart, this blog is not going to be super deep and vulnerable, but rather a simple touch into those sort of things. There will hopefully be a time and space for that coming soon, but for the sake of where I’m at, this is not that time and this blog post is not that space. 

I WOULD however love to talk in greater depth and with more vulnerability about any of the things featured here, so I would love to have those conversations. And I don’t want it to be a one-sided conversation, I would be honored to sit and hear about your life and what the Lord has been doing and all you’ve been up to. I genuinely mean that, I’d love to just sit and listen and join you in prayer. Please please please shoot me a text (404-632-7598) and I’d love to set a time to call or to grab a cup of coffee or to talk over lunch!

All that being said, here’s an update on where I’ve been and what I’ve been up to. A little bit of everything from coming home to my current season to what I’ve been learning to what may be to come in the future! It’s a little lengthy, but I’d love if you gave it a little read through or at least a quick skim! 

COMING HOME

Coming home from the Race was a transition more difficult than I had anticipated. My first week back in the States, I was home alone. I was no longer living every second of every day surrounded by 20 something of my best friends. After my friends dropped me off at home at around 1AM from the airport, I went and took a shower. I took a shower in the bathroom without people standing beyond the curtain brushing their teeth or washing their faces or making conversation as life was happening in the tiny bathroom I shared with seven other people. Then I got out and I went to my room. I went to my room in my American house that I had all to myself. My room that was just barely smaller then the room that housed eight people in Guatemala, or than the room that housed twelve of us in Ecuador. Then I layed in my bed on my comfy mattress, and went to sleep without random giggles and comments as everyone else in the room faded off into sleep. I went to sleep all alone in my silent room with no one to yell out “goodnight I love you” to.

Then came summer and this strange tension of trying to settle back into life in America. Settle back into driving my car and having the freedom to hop in it and do anything I wanted at any time that I wanted. Settle back into planning time to hang out with friends instead of that being something that came so naturally from living life with people 24/7. I was left to settle back into going into a grocery store, having anything I could have wanted right at my fingertips. To settle back into what I had known as “normal life” for the first 18 years of my life, while also navigating a lot of ways that life has changed and now looks a lot different than what I’d always known.

Summer also felt like this strange tension of trying to be where my feet were at home and reconnect and catch up with family and with friends, while still wanting to maintain relationship with everyone I had just gotten done living life with for the nine months before, while also looking forward to and preparing my heart for what was coming next – another program through Adventures in Missions called the Center For Global Action (CGA).

CGA & CLASSES

This brings us to August 6, move in day for CGA, and the mark of the start of a new season. A few days after move in, my entire class and I headed up to Chattanooga, TN for welcome week. During welcome week, we spent time hanging out and playing games and getting to know one another, as well as discussing our “why?” for being here. After getting back home from Tennessee, we started up with classes! Classes happen every Monday from 9-5, and every Tuesday-Thursday from 9-noon, with house church from 9-noon every Friday! The goal of classes is to help us each grow in the motto of CGA, which is to “know yourself, lead yourself, and lead others.” During classes so far, we’ve covered a lot of really awesome topics such as identity, relationships, the Myer’s Briggs personality test, finances, leadership & team dynamics, just to name a few. It’s been an extremely eye-opening process getting to hear the perspectives and pieces of the stories of each of my classmates. In this, I feel like I’m learning a lot more of what it looks like to hold the stories of others well, and how to meet people who come from all different backgrounds and walks of life right where they’re at. 

CGA so far has been so incredibly stretching and challenging, and has been leading to a lot of deeper knowing of myself and the Father, paired with a lot of growth and a lot redemption.

THE GROVE

During my time here back in Gainesville, GA with CGA, I’m living in a CGA house (not a tent this time around!) known as the grove. At the grove, I’m living with six of my classmates, two CGA interns, a CGA alumni, and our two house mentors! While living in a house with twelve people for sure has its challenges, it has been so incredible to dive back into a community so centered on the Lord that pushes me closer towards Him and towards growth and deeper freedom. 

TXRH

While in CGA, I have been working at Texas Roadhouse as a to-go host. This basically entails me working in the kitchen organizing all the to-go orders and making sure it comes out correctly. I mention this to say that I spend a lot of time in the back of the restaurant, having conversation by the drink station and cultivating relationships with some of my coworkers there. It has honestly been incredibly difficult to be working there, as it is at times a really negative environment. The Lord has been teaching me a lot about what it looks like to view a job like Texas Roadhouse as my ministry in the season. Getting to step into that space and love people there like Jesus would and bring the light of the Lord into the restaurant has been incredibly stretching and incredibly humbling. One of the biggest opportunities I’ve gotten to step into is being able to drive one of my coworkers home after work a lot. Through our drives from the restaurant to her home, I have gotten to hear parts of her stories and hear about how the Lord  has brought so much redemption in her life. I’ve gotten to sit with her on her front porch as she shares her heart with me, and have gotten to sit with and cry with and pray over her. I’ve been incredibly humbled and honored by the fact that the Lord trusts me enough to come into this space and love people where they’re at. 

A LITTLE GLIMPSE INTO WHAT I’VE BEEN LEARNING

Throughout CGA, I have been walking through a lot of refinement in solidifying my identity. It’s looked a lot like uprooting and combating lies I’ve believed about myself for so long, diving deeper into who the Lord says that I am, and stepping into a lot of new freedom and confidence in who I am and I’ve been made to be. It has also looked like a lot of healing from struggles of the past (thank God they’re in the past now and the chains have been broken!!!!). There’s been a lot of shedding of the fear of man partnered with steps towards the Father and towards truth and towards freedom.

I’ve also been learning a lot about the Father heart of God, and what it looks like to view Him as not just a Father but as my Dad, as well as what it looks like for Him to love me as His daughter. I’ve been floored by the fact that I can come to Him in this way and call Him Abba. By the fact that He chooses me and pours His unconditional love over me. Been in awe over this a lot lately.

WHAT MAY BE NEXT?

As of recently, I have been praying a lot into what the next semester may look like and into what the Lord may have in store for me in the next season. At the moment, my plan is to continue living in Gainesville and continue living another season with some of the community the Lord has blessed me with here. In that, I plan on potentially continuing to work at Texas Roadhouse and continuing to build relationships there, and continue stepping into what the Lord is asking of me in that space. 

I have also been exploring the possibility of starting college, either online this Spring, or in person starting in the Fall. In college, I am looking into studying mathematics education to eventually teach high school math, as well as a minor in studio art or Spanish! This is something I honestly didn’t think I’d find myself planning for or excited about doing, but I’ve been learning a lot about joyful obedience in following the Lord, so if college is what’s next, He has my yes, without hesitation. 

PRAYER & FUNDRAISING

With all this being said, I would love to ask you to consider partnering with me during this season of CGA, as well as moving forward! I would love if you would be willing to join me in prayer. Some things that you could be praying for in this time:

 my heart – that it is open to learning & growing & healing

my workplace – that I am able to cultivate deeper relationship there, and step into work each day in a way that reflects the heart of God and the love of Jesus

the future – that I am able to operate in a spirit of deeper obedience and a deeper yes over what the Lord is calling me into next

fundraising – in order to stay as a part of CGA, I have to raise another $5,400. I have been extremely behind in fundraising, so prayers for provision in that

I would also love to be able to step into a space of intentionally praying over each of you, so if there are any specific areas of your life I can join you in praying for, I would be honored to do so. This can seriously be anything, big or small or anything in between. It will stay between you, me, and Abba!

Thank you for taking the time to read through this, it means a whole whole lot to me!

All my love, 

Reagan <3